My 19th Valentine’s Day Alone + Tips For Being Your Own Valentine


Tomorrow will be my 19th Valentine’s day without a significant other. And, I’m totally okay with that. I’ve learned over the years that I don’t need a man to make me happy or make me feel worthy. I don’t need him to show me love every day.

I don’t need the love of a man because I’m surrounded by love. I have the love of friends and family. I have the love of my Heavenly Father. And, that is all the love I need right now.

But, I didn’t come to this realization overnight.

When I was 10 I honestly thought I would be married by now or at least be in a relationship. My dream was to be married and have 12 kids and live on a farm. I wasn’t content with being single. I didn’t want to be single. I wanted that love and companionship and support that comes from a relationship.

Every day, I’m learning that I can get that companionship and support from other people. I don’t need some guy giving me chocolate and roses on this one day to make me happy. I have all the love I need right here.


Every day, my dreams are changing as I become more and more content with where I am in life. Of course, I’m still open to a relationship, but I’m not actively searching for one. I’ve learned that if it happens it happens. It’s not something that I can force into existence. I’m learning to trust God’s timing for everything. And, He knows when I’m emotionally, mentally, and physically ready for a relationship.

Along with that realization has come the realization that I may never be ready. That realization has taken the longest to come to terms with. Today, I can honestly say that I’m happy I’m alone on Valentine’s day. It really doesn’t matter to me.

Actually, I totally forgot tomorrow is Valentine’s day until someone said something about it on Twitter and I realized tomorrow is the 14th…. Oops, LOL. There’s just so many other exciting things happening in my life right now that I don’t have time to worry or really care that I’m alone again.


In Light of Tomorrow being National Single’s Awareness Day, here are 6 Ways to Be your own Valentine



1. Treat Yo’ Self

Because, you are a strong, talented human being and you deserve the love that you give yourself. Take yourself out to dinner. Or, go out with friends. Do what makes you happy. Whether that’s a fancy dinner or pizza and Netflix in your pajamas. You don’t need someone else in your life to give you those things.

Encourage yourself! Boost your Confidence! Embrace Your Singleness!


2. Write Your Future Self a Love Letter

Buy some fancy stationary and nice pens. Sit down, and write about all the good things that are happening in your life right now. Talk about what makes you happy. Add in all of your favorite parts of your body and personality. Talk about why you love those parts of you.

Then, seal it up, put it in a safe place, and read it next Valentine’s day.



3. Buy Yourself Chocolate

This is probably the most basic tip for everyone single on Valentine’s day. But, do it anyway. Go out and buy yourself your favorite chocolate. Wrap it up. Make it all fancy. And, then eat it while watching a sappy movie or while watching a superhero movie. Watch whatever kind of movie you like. You don’t have anyone to discuss it with!


4. Make Yourself a Fancy Dinner.

Or, post mate Chick-Fil-A. Do what you want to do and you love doing because today is all about you.


5. Spend the Day with People Who are Really Lonely.

Go to an assisted living facility and ask which residents they know will be alone. And, visit them. Or hang out in the common areas and talk with the residents. Ask them about life when they were your age. Ask them what they loved most about their lives. Bring them cards and show that you care about them.

Volunteer at a homeless shelter. Volunteer at a pound. Host a Valentine’s Dinner for widows.

Just, go out and find people who are having a rough time this Valentine’s day and show them that you care about them.

There is nothing that makes a person happier than making someone else happy.


6. Buy  Flowers for the People Who Have Impacted You the Most in Your Life and Hand Deliver Them

Fill out a card for them telling them why they mean a lot to you. Or, write them a letter or a poem or draw something. Show them your love in your favorite way of expression. Everyone shows love differently. Learn to read how different people perceive it.


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Use Valentine’s Day to Show the World the Love that You have for Others. it doesn’t matter how you express it or who you express it to. Just, use this day to care more about others than you do yourself. Or, spend the day treating yourself. Because you are someone who deserves love every day even if it’s just the love you give yourself!


Today’s question is, how do you like to show love to others? Is it through physical contact – hugging, etc…? Through food? Through letters and cards? Through art? Through music? Comment below! I’d love to know!

Share this post with all the singles in your life! Let’s spread some love for all of us #foreveralone people!


Soli Deo Gloria,

How to Be Single On Valentine's Day!



About the Author



Aaron Cook

Great list when treating yourself on Valentine’s day, Spending money on food/stuff for yourself and hanging out with friends, but what would you do if you are a broke high-school/college student?

What are your (Heather) plans for treating yourself tomorrow?


Thank you!

Ummm…. Watch a movie and eat whatever food we have… LOL. Or, read a book.

Eating chocolate and playing on the internet probably. I really don’t plan things ahead of time… LOL


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